When the burden seems too much to bear, remember the end will justify the pain it took to get us there.
I am not good at having the conversations that no one wants to have. At saying the unsaid words that need to come out. They come out as thoughts or whispers across a space that feels large and empty. They come out as sarcasm or passing thoughts as life travels between the state of awake and asleep. Or they sit in a jar, collecting dust, taking up space knowing they will never be moved or dusted. I allow the insecurity that is me to stop my thoughts, my words.
I need to learn to voice my fears. My inhibitions. Those things that just dont seem right. And to do so without arguing. Between freshman year and now I have become an emotional human. One that speaks, lives, and breathes emotion. I cannot share my thoughts and fears and concerns like an automated report. I feel. Deeply. And because of that I struggle with my words. With sharing. With opening up. But I am finally seeing this isnt beneficial. This is only creating divides. Opening wounds instead of building bridges. I need to learn to voice the pain and frustrations to get there.