Overjoyed. The step was smaller than a babies. Tiny. Just a movement but perhaps it meant everything. I was feeling again.
I have been so caught up for nearly two years. Exams. Stress. Trying to get somewhere that seemed impossible. Then the moment the door opened and I could work there was nothing. It was as if I opened a long anticipated door only to find an empty room. The jobs I had convinced myself I wanted were not what I wanted. The jobs I now wanted didnt seem to exist. I was trapped. My eggs had been thrown over the fence into this empty room. Maybe I had been hoping for something that wasnt real. Perhaps all of this time had made me realize I didnt want this.
Until yesterday. I finally had that feeling again. I felt like myself. I felt alive. It was as if I had been suffocating for so long that I forgot what air felt like and then all of a sudden there was oxygen. My life was back. I want this more than almost anything. This interview could be the rest of my life. A real interview. I passed the screening, they want to see me, to meet me. This is my chance. Five more sleeps until a day that could change my life.
I forgot how beautiful I can be when I am happy. When I feel passion for something. My dream job is close enough I can breathe it. I need this.